I'm dangerous in second best

I don't know if there's enough to go around
but I'm hoping you'll take from me what you can get
what's left of me besides the sound
but here's to you getting what you sent

and oh my
you're looking beautiful tonight
at least I'm assuming because I haven't seen you smiling in a while
and oh my you're looking so extravagant tonight
and I'm not all knowing
but I doubt he's at all disappointed in tonight

I'm holding out for you
but you've got other plans
other plans for me and you
Your words were mixed up in the telephone line
because you said something about the future
and me and you and love
and and I'm tearing out my sutures
so can someone sew me back up please?
sew me back up please

until I arrive
I just hope that you're happy
until you wake
I hope you're thinking of me
because I know that in the daylight you see his smiling face
and everything is just so bright
and so I'll talk to you tomorrow night

this smoke is so thick
and the embers are charring my skin
they're writing your name in
cursive across the the same place
where you held me
held my hand and looked in my eyes
and now there's nothing but smoke and cries
in the place where you once said you loved me most of all

until I arrive
I just hope that you're happy
until you wake
I hope you're thinking of me
because I know that in the daylight you see his smiling face
and everything is just so bright
and so I'll talk to you tomorrow night

Here, I wrote you a song. Knock yourself out

he's sitting in his bed
he's got this story in his head
this story about a girl
and the whirlwind
that brought them both to an end

they're all poised just right
all the characters
and all their plights
but the story's about his girl
just enough to make you sick
the words are on the tip
of her tongue oh, what fun!

he knows where they go
where all the bad ones go
all the criminals and broken bones
but he can't place her,
she'll go down as the one that
got the best of him, in the end

you're running from the pain
it's so easy to see
why don't you just wait?
you've got all this time
you'll be doing just fine
when all is written in the end

with every breath
i've got your number
i've got your guesses and the place where you slumber
with every breath
you get further away
you've got all my messes and all my mistakes

you've got your pistol loaded with excuses
and some more rounds of apologies
"i don't knows..." and "i'm so sorrys"
you'll shoot them at him but it will be useless
he's got his pen and what happened is bulletproof
the ink won't run the way the blood would
"I don't knows.." and "I'm so sorrys"
don't work on hearts made out of cold and slate

Who measures the desperate measures?

Traded this pen
for your cigarette
Because I swore I wouldn't write another song about you
But here I go again

I see your lips mouth "I love you"
But the words I hear are "I told you so"
And you know I won't say "no"
to another day of you

We traded our sins
like it was "tit for tat" or "that for this"
And so I swore I wouldn't write another song for you
But here I go again
Because I've got your smile in my head
and your voice in my ears
Saying "remember those nights in your bed?
And saying aloud all our biggest fears?"

I see your lips mouth "I love you"
But the words I hear are "I told you so"
Because you know I can't say "no"
to another night with you

Just one more night
we'll lie awake
just another night
we'll lie to fate
the phones are ringing off the hook
since we figured how the world shook
but when it's quiet... can you feel it?
when it's quiet...I know you see it
when it's quiet...
I hope you hear my voice
Because my lips are mouthing
"I swear I won't write another song for you"
But I'm really saying "baby I love you too."

Self-Injury

Surround myself with smoke
because at least it's here, you know?
and maybe I'm just feeling sorry for myself
and you're probably right about that, you know?
So I surround myself with flame
because at least it's warm, you know?
and maybe I'm just hurting myself
because you're probably right about that, you know?

You don't know how much I miss you
and maybe if you could see the scars you would
but I'm not taking the band aids off
I kinda wish you could see, too
but I doubt you would understand, could you?
but I'm not taking the band aids off

A secret's silence is a secret's safe

Just think of all the things you don't
and feel all the things you won't
and see all the things you don't
and hear my voice say you can't
and know that I'm wrong

Ashes burn my skin
such a little thing
such a little scar
means the world
when you're so far

so I fall down
my hands hurt from the prayers
and the embers
I'm burning like a bridge
and I'm falling from so far down
I'm falling for sure

Step into the light
so I can see what
they've done to you
Fall from grace
with more style than bright
but don't tell them what you know

and now I fall down
my hands burn from the prayers
and the embers
I'm burning like a bridge
And I'm falling for sure

It's coming down
I'm coming down
I won't let on
But I want you to know
I'm falling down
It's falling down
I can't tell them
but I thought you should know
What no one else could know
because you already do

I want to be strong enough
to say enough is enough
I want to be new
and I want to be clean
But I know I'm not
and I haven't seen enough
I'm not new, and I'm not clean
But I thought you should know
What no one else could know

Summer heights, sleepless nights

a head full of worry
and lungs full of smoke
and these ashes keep falling on my skin
but that's alright, I know I'm ok

You know I'm thinking of you
at least I hope you do
So... here's your thought for the night
it's about how you keep me up at night

my throat burns
but I don't want to stop
I hope I still cross your mind
when you see smoke crown from lips

You know I'm thinking of you
baby, I know you do
Here's your thought for the night
About how I dream of your touch in the night

This smoke breaks
like the waves I wish I was under
The waves you bring
The ones of hope and cover

I'm feeling withdraws
i've hit a wall
I was going so fast
but now I'm heading for a fall
And i don't know if it's missing you
or just the nicotine
But I need you here
and you're so far from me
A head full of worry
and lungs full of smoke
I've got all these addictions
but you're the most potent of all

The Basic Essentials Of A Very Bitter Young Man

I'm tired of liars and midnight lovers
Cigarettes glowing through the night
and pictures of all the others fading without any light

So this one goes out to anyone who's ever said,
"I'm tired of this shit, let's get it together."
The ones who can't stand to take another hit
The ones who can't be under cover anymore
because their cover isn't anymore

I'm tired of liars and dreams that seem too real
Cigarettes burning through the night
When nothing in this town seals a deal
Without the consent of people who haven't seen the real thing

Is there just too much to take, to tell?
Well here's my card, it says,
"Welcome to everyone's personal hell."
So if you've been waiting for your sign
to do something to makes you smile
This is it

I'm tired of liars and long distance phone calls
All the missed calls and bad connections aren't doing it for me
There's cigarettes burning states away
Lighting up the night like fireflies
Until they're put out like everything else in this town

Credit deposits, lost tuition
Dooney and Burke handbags and
brand new cars collecting dust
Withdrawn deposits spent with no fruition
Reading what you want in magazines and
your whole life collecting dust

I'm tired of liars and charlatans
Your cigarettes don't light up the day
like mine light up the night.
At least I'm trying to make things brighter
At least I can say I'm trying

It's coming through your headphones

i saw the world come out of your eyes
when we kiss, I saw the sunrise
every single word I ever thought for you
couldn't say what I wanted to then

everything's so dark when you're not here
I miss all the color you bring
and the black and white is killing me
I just like reminding you that I care...

i saw the world come out of your eyes
when we kiss, I saw the sunrise
every single word I ever thought for you
couldn't say what I wanted to then

everything is so vibrant when you're here
i love all the color you bring
because all that black and white was killing me
so call me on it if i stare
but I can't help it when you're near...

every single word I've ever thought for you
couldn't say what I feel around you
so we'll call this settling
because anything else is tempting
but tiring
please know all these words
weak rhymes and bad metaphors
are all mirrors for what I really want to say

I saw the oceans in your eyes
the waves broke as tears on your cheek
I feel the rain on my body
from all the clouds on your skin
I saw the sunrise through your hair
giving away your halo for all to see
I feel the breeze against my skin
when your lips touch mine again

i saw the world come out of your eyes
when we kiss, I saw the sunrise
every single word I ever thought for you
couldn't say what I wanted to then

Breakdown At The Speed Of Sound

She’s watching t.v.
And she’s speeding up her breathing
She’s living in the moment
And she’s not letting anything bring her down
She’s focused on being unfocused
And she’s certain that she doesn’t know
But she’s speeding up her breathing
And getting ready for impact

And this is where she hits the breakdown
This is the only thing she knows
This is the way she sounds when going under
And this is only minutes away from the ground

Now she’s humming along with the stereo
And she’s speeding up her heartbeat
Thinking about anyone here now
Hoping the words mean more to anyone else at all
But now she’s focused
Her point is oh so precise
And she’s speeding up her heartbeat
Because it’s better than letting it lie

And this where she hits her breakdown
This is the only thing she knows
This is the way she sounds when she’s going under
And now she’s seconds away from the ground

How long before she crumbles?
It’s only a matter of time
How long before she plunges into the ocean?
It’s only a matter of time
She’s falling faster than anyone could help
And she’s sinking faster than she could tell

Now she’s turning up the stereo
But she’s watching with the tv on mute
So no one can hear her heartbeat race
And no one can hear her breathing increase
And no one can hear her cries in the night
That disappear in the light
She’s heading towards the ground
And she hits it every night
But whenever the sun creeps in through her windows
She’s a bit higher in the air than she thinks
And she knows there’s someone who’s going to catch her
When she can wake herself up

It's always windy in Barstow

i don't know what you're thinking
and i'm not sure i want to
but whatever it is, i'm thinking it too
and i never wanted to let you go at all

you left me blind on the curbside
and i cried all my way home
that park will never look the same
and neither will the insides of your eyes

cause
when you leave
it's like there's a gaping hole
inside of me
and i don't know how to make it
go away
and i guess you can't just
let me be

so you call me up
tell me that you miss me and
oh what am I supposed to say?
Well we won't admit it but we know where this is headed


cause
when you leave
it's like there's a gaping hole
inside of me
and i don't know how to make it
go away
and i guess you can't just
let me be

"what are we doing?"
"I don't know... I don't really want to know, you know?"
"This is is confusing..."
"I know, but it's kinda fun that way, you know?
"What are you thinking?"
"Nothing you don't already know..."


cause
when you leave
it's like there's a gaping hole
inside of me
and i don't know how to make it
go away
and i guess you can't just
let me be

"I've gotta go..."
"But I don't want you to."
"I've gotta be somewhere..."
"You've gotta be right here, right here.."
"But I, I, I, I need to leave..."
"...right here, right here, right here."
"I think, think, think, I need to, need to....
"Stay right here?"
"Stay right here."

Cause when you leave,
there's a gaping hole inside of me
and i can't make it go away